Someone New

He is someone new
interesting
mysterious
yet quietly courageous
he compliments
he is mildly sensitive
intelligent, brings a feeling of free
sense of security
he is a conversationist, the change, the different
the better then before, the hopeful
he is uplifting, protecting,
he is handsome, soft, strong, and loving
the just is right, the how,
he is exciting, random
he is surprising, he is perfect,
he cant be the one for me,
Can He?

Foolish Heart

I'm covered
No one gets to get in
Protected
armor, guards, and big pit pull dogs defend this heart
Collect everything
all feelings gathered and compressed in jar
no liberation, last time they got out
he did not feel the same way
quiet, no sharing and definitely no explaining
he knew my story and to wound me,
used every bit of it against me
to destroy all the development I have made within me
folding in on myself
stressful feeling in my chest, find myself worried about me
needing time to ask myself when did all this become me
unready,
no preparation for the unfolding,  lost my cape
because if my love was real how can I trust another to reciprocate
lost, everything and everybody I thought I knew and know
disoriented, confused, baffled expressions
unaware of everything, family, friends
when I thought, with him I was feeling heaven
doubt, no chance of me and another
every one of him, is the same
uncertainty, every thought or emotions of
connected with another is unsettling

Random: Late Night Poetry Session

You walked into my life when depression seemed to become the root of it all
I was giving up, willing to give up everything,
 turn in it all But you appeared just in time, potent enough to take on it all
Strong enough to correct everything in love that I have experienced was wrong
Change my heart to believe that it is possible to stumble upon a king of your own
One willing enough to heal a Queen who is the most important and beautiful of her kind but yet seemed to coexist with a covert jester
who only wanted to see her fall this Queen unable to eat,
 not able to battle her weakest enemies unable to sleep,
rest for energy to control her own activity Incapable of speech because conversation seemed to lack substance or truth,
it didn’t have any not able to see because water filled eyes made everything blurry
But you, you a King were strong for this Queen physically and mentally
holding on to God given power that only a real man could carry a King allowing his queen to rest not just for beauty but for him because her strength is the reason why he lives
A king who speaks not just of authority but of praises and respect for a Queen who makes him feel like she makes up each and every cell running through his body
And a King able to wipe off or turn those tears of his Queen to joy,
because just the feeling of her presence near, raises every hair on his body arose
A king who knows the risk of loving this Queen is all his and worth it
But he does,
because that is what a ruler of real love was sent to love
A Queen unable to be depressed when her night in shining armor is also her best
 A king who does not make it hard for his Queen
And a King who forces depression to leave and makes it easy for her to watch bad love make it leave This king doesn’t want space, and will wait up for her
 He rather be in a Thorne beside hers or occupying the same area that she blessed,
 A king who ago knows a Queen deserves better and this King is that better
And no other man be that space filler a Queen is not inadequate rather she is beyond ample enough for the King
 A king will do anything to make his Queen stay
 A king will walk in her life ready to stay and we never be somewhere else when his Queen needs him

Week #2

He's gone forever

I lost you quicker
A lot faster than I thought you were going to go
Thoughts are not even allowed to linger
and body no longer will experience a tingle
every time you come near, because now you’re gone like the sun going away after the day ends
but the only difference is, you are not coming back again
Gone forever maybe to find out who we really are
without each other
gone forever
and no longer can I ask were are we and where have we gone
because we lost each other during that week
and there is no use in looking for each other because we disappeared and neither of us were meant to be seeked
but the smell of you still lives here and it sensitive to nose
you are gone forever but when your scent travels past my nose
I get this tendency to turn around in hope that you might possibly appear once more
like a car traveling down a one way road,  there’s no way of squeezing another car in for two
he is gone forever
and I did not make you love me, you just did
now he is gone forever, but where does love go when what we had ends
does love keep running until it is all out, or does it just get buried inside of us
until our futures allow us to meet back up
I don’t know if I no longer anticipate seeing your name call my phone
or making sure you are the last face I see before my eyes rest for awhile
he is gone forever
so I anticipate a new beginning and the blurry vision of a man who will one day be the first face I see when I wake up in the morning
already looking back at me
because he did not want to miss awakening of his future

he is gone forever
and maybe that’s why I do not try to think about that as much
and I do not know if it is possible to feel that way again for another. but I am hoping I can
he is gone forever
and I never wanted happily ever after
because that would mean that one day we would eventually end
and that is what exactly happened to us
you are gone from me for ever
and I wished before that I could be all… for you
but he is gone forever and I am nothing at all to you
we are gone forever
and it might not be possible to start new

This Week #1